In 2015, I began to desire a different trajectory. The work – life balance (or is it work- life rhythm?) was not happening for me.

Our young family was growing. At the time, I was a mother of 2 and while our children were too young to speak for themselves, something within me began to shift.

I had always desired to be a present mom. Yet, my career at the bank was starting to take shape. I got a promotion and entered a role that resonated with my strengths and passion – customer service. And so came the question: to quit or not to quit?

After maternity leave was over (3 months felt 3 days!), my husband and I considered our circumstances. We decided that I would keep working for a few more years then step up into a different space.

The challenge with these kinds of decisions is that the conviction may not match the circumstances. I had a loan to pay off and a credit card to clear so back to work I went.

By 2018, when we got our 3rd born, I was so conflicted! The conviction to step up was growing, making me restless. I prayed, I cried, I whined, I complained but had to wait until it was time.

What was I waiting for?

I needed my husband and I to be on the same page about this major decision.

I needed to be free from debt.

I needed to listen to God for clear direction on my next step.

I needed to mature so that I could handle whatever came with this decision.

And what have I learnt in the past 4 years?

First, there is such power in oneness. If I had made the decision to leave my job without my husband’s consent, I would have navigated the subsequent seasons on my own.

It was also important to explain to our children why I was taking a career break. I needed their backing and together we have made the necessary adjustments to fit our current season.

Second, God is our source. We have abased and abounded but God has been faithful.

Third, not everyone understands your ‘why’. Stepping up into obedience may often appear to others (and maybe even yourself at times) as stepping down from opportunity. It may look ‘crazy’ but trust God’s leading and He will perfect that which concerns you.

I am glad I was bold enough to step up. I am grateful for the healing and stability God has brought to our family as a result. We have many testimonies of what God has accomplished in our midst because of our intentionality and availability in parenting our children.

Are you at the verge of making a major life decision? Wait, pray, seek counsel, but most of all, do not ignore your deep-seated convictions – Step up!